Yes, this is a title of a Monty Python movie, and while I love all things Python, I have decided to write a few lines about something else I enjoy; Doctor Who.  Now, I’ve not been a huge fan of the adventurous Time Lord for years and years and years, I have found a deep love of the series first through the modern 2005 beyond era as well as the classic era (1963-1989).

Many people assume that I have been involved in the fandom of the show primarily because of of the modern day storyline and that my favorite doctor is one of the four modern doctors; Christopher Eccleson, David Tennant, Matt Smith, or Peter Capaldi.  The reality is; as much as I enjoy the adventures of all four to some degree, my favorite Doctor is Colin Baker, particularly for his work in the Big Finish audios, where he absolutely shines!  Take a listen, if you dare, but don’t say I didn’t warn you when you get hooked!

No I do not have a least favorite Doctor, I enjoy them all to varying degrees and have had the honor to meet three of them face to face.  However I must say that there is at least one companion that grates on my nerves and no it’s not who you think.  I really have no issues with Adric or Peri or Mel.  Those three somehow always seem to get the most critiques from fans, but the three actors who play them are delightful and they were relateable because they were not considered to be perfect.  This is why I like the Doctor’s current companion, Bill Potts, so much.

Bill is quirky, fun, and very inquisitive.  She’s not afraid to get up into the Doctor’s face and call him out about his non-human-ness.  She offers gratitude where she can, but she can also get angry too and in the scenario that recently played out in the episode Thin Ice, it was not unwarranted anger.  The fact is, Bill’s questions are real, and the argument that she had with the Doctor was also real.  This emerged, not because she was necessarily angry with him, but because the anger she carried emerged through an emotion called ‘grief’.  Having witnessed what she had actually seen gave way for her to understand the way the Doctor lives and how it was that he had grown immune to the calamities that he has witnessed during every single one of his adventures.

Going a bit deeper, I really like the questions that she asks because they are always the questions that I had about the TARDIS.  Where’s the bathroom, why are the seats so ‘unrealistically set’ etc.  It is sort of like asking the ‘Next Generation’ Enterprise crew why they never installed seat belts on the bridge if it’s the 24th Centery?  These are the sorts of questions that every single person has asked over time, but no one has really answered until one of the movies was made and Picard had a seatbelt.  Now the question is; will he use it or continue to fly about the bridge like a popcorn ball in a hot air machine?

Bill’s questions are ones that give off the impression that the TARDIS is as big of a mystery as it is a home and it has the things that each home has; a kitchen or a  bathroom.  I mean; realistically, even the Enterprise had quarters assigned to the people who were on board, so there were never questions about that raised.  With the modern TARDIS, there were discussions of private rooms, but no one ever really ventured into them.  In the classic series, the private rooms were evident and used to help the story along.

To me, the counter to Bill, is Clara; who is probably my least favorite companion, whether considering modern or classic eras.  The reason for that, is the notion that Clara comes off as the ‘perfect’ companion who can do no wrong.  That was the essence that she gave off and it annoyed me to no end.   It was like she went through this thing where she was first the ‘Impossible Girl’, and then when that story ended and the Doctor regenerated and suddenly they tried to make her appear more human with a relationship with poor Danny Pink.  When that did not work, she looses Danny tragically and then later gets her own TARDIS.  Clara is the sort of companion that I was ready to say good-bye to when Matt Smith’s Doctor regenerated to Peter Capaldi’s Doctor.  The few episodes that she was in with Matt Smith were okay, but later, the interaction between her and Capaldi felt forced and consumed with anger and bitterness.  It was almost as though she was fangirling over this young, spry Doctor, and then never got used to working with someone who was older than his predecessor.

The straw that broke it for me was when they used Clara’s face in the opening credits at the end of series eight.  I was like ‘Oh God, what were they thinking?’  Now I know, some fans loved it.  I have plenty of friends who think Clara is the best thing since sliced bread, but to me the whole, let’s put Clara up next to the Doctor thing just made me completely lose any empathy I could have had for her.  I think the only companion who could have even come close to the Doctor in intelligence, wisdom, and guts was Zoe Harriot and even she was not presented as a ‘perfect’ character.  In fact, her friendship with other characters gave her a more endearing essence.  How often have I smiled when she corrected Jamie’s pronunciation of words and ideas or tried to talk down at the Doctor, only to be proven inaccurate?  She was, simply put, a genius character.

I don’t mean to use this blog as a means to bash Clara, but if I had to choose which actors I would want to meet from Doctor who, I would probably pick any actor, companion or Doctor, over her.  The reason is probably nothing at all to do with the actress’ abilities or if she’s nice or not.  Basically, I enjoy meeting people that I can, at least, relate to, and with Clara’s character (which is the only way I have been able to see the actresss), I can’t really relate to her on any level.

To coin a phrase:  It would be impossible.